When everyday life gets too much

– on autistic burnout

By Kristian Eskildsen

Mange mennesker med autisme oplever i perioder en særlig form for udmattelse, som ofte kaldes autistic burnout or autistic burnout. This is how the English magazine Autism Parenting Magazine writes.

It's not just ordinary tiredness after a busy week. For some, it can feel as though both the body and brain are partially shutting down. Things that were normally manageable suddenly become very difficult.

This could be:

• to have conversations
• to oversee shopping or practical tasks
• to concentrate
• being with other people
• to handle sounds, lights, or other sensory impressions

Some also experience increased restlessness, anxiety, irritability, or a need to withdraw from social relationships.

Anxiety and depression send autistic people to psychiatrists

”When we psychiatrists see people with autism, it's usually because there have been so many stressors over a long period that other symptoms such as anxiety or depression have developed. It may be necessary to focus treatment on this first. When the worst symptoms are improving, one can look at the underlying stress, which many people with autism experience, and which often leads to burnout,” says psychiatrist Peter Mark.

Why does it happen?

People with autism often expend a lot of energy adapting to their surroundings. Many consciously or unconsciously try to hide their difficulties in order to fit in at work, in social groups, or in family life.

It is sometimes called “masking”.

Over time, this can become very burdensome. If you also experience stress, many demands, or too few breaks, your body and nervous system can eventually protest.

For some, the burden comes on gradually. For others, it's triggered by major life changes, conflicts, illness, or prolonged periods of high pressure.

Signs to be aware of

Autistic burnout can look different from person to person, but typical signs can include:

• Extreme tiredness
• increased sensitivity to sound, light or touch
• Problems with memory and overview
• greater need for alone time
• The feeling of being “completely full up”
• difficulties in completing ordinary everyday tasks
• less surplus for social relations
• increased tendency to break down or withdraw

Some describe it as having “lost access” to abilities they normally have.

It rarely helps just to pull yourself together

Many react by pushing themselves even harder. But this often prolongs the strain.

With autistic burnout, recovery is usually not about doing more, but about reducing the strain for a period.

This could include, for example:

• fewer requirements and agreements
• more breaks during the day
• sensory impressions
• clearer borders
• more sleep and recovery
• time for interests and activities that bring peace

For some, it also helps to talk to people who understand autism and neurodivergence.

Shame often makes it harder

Many experience guilt or shame at not being able to do the same as before.

But autistic burnout is not a sign of laziness or weakness. It is often a sign that the strain has been too great for too long.

This is why self-understanding and self-care are important parts of recovery.

Small changes can make a big difference

It's rarely realistic to change your whole life overnight. But small adjustments can make everyday life more sustainable over time.

For many, it's not about “getting back to the old version of themselves,” but about finding a way to live where there's a better balance between demands and resources.

If one recognises the signs in oneself, it can be helpful to seek support and take the symptoms seriously in time.

There is help, and you don't have to go through it alone.

Michael is an example of autistic burnout. 
Doctor Kate Aamund meets many patients who present with autistic burnout. One example was Michael, who after his son had been diagnosed, came himself to be assessed. He had always been fast-paced and involved in many projects. Now, in his late 50s, he thought he had ADHD.
He had that too, but beneath the ADHD, there was an autism that he had masked with alcohol throughout his life.
Read Michael's full story in next month's newsletter.